A Mom's Mom

When I was a little girl, I wanted to be just like my mom...
This Sunday is Mother's Day. A whole day to honor the woman who gave me life. I've always liked Mother's Day...even when I was a little girl, I would pick flowers or draw a picture for my mom, excited to try and show her just how much I loved her.
However, Mother's Day took on a whole new meaning when I became a mother myself. Not until then did I really appreciate everything I have in my mom. For those of you who are not fortunate enough to know her,
my mother is AMAZING.
She truly is the most beautiful woman I know.
As a child, I was never really aware of all that my mom did for our family. I think that's part of what makes her such an amazing mom... she never requests thanks or praise; she gave selflessly to us because she wanted to.
I know that with everything in her, my mom wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. She wanted to be there when we came home from school each day and to spend our summers playing together. But she couldn't. Financially, it would have been a bad decision for our family. And so she didn't. I never saw the labor of love in my mom's working until it was my turn to drop my baby off at daycare while I went to work all day. What about all the moments of his life I would miss?! How could I ever trust that anyone (even the best "nanny" of them all) would take care of him like I would?! "You're doing this FOR him," my mom told me. "I know it's hard. But it's not the number of minutes you get with him that matters... it's how you make those minutes count in his life."
Advice from a woman who's been there.
And she's right. And so every day I try to make the most of the hours (however few) that I spend with my son... teaching him and playing with him and laughing with him... just like my mom did with me.
I also never understood why my mother wore the same winter coat for the entirety of my childhood... Didn't she realize that it was the farthest thing from stylish?! In fact, I'm not sure that a navy and red "trench coat" (for lack of a better word) was EVER stylish! How could she wear that thing year in and year out and not seem to care?! Now I know... she wore the same coat every year because her growing babies couldn't, and even when we reached the age where we could... so we wouldn't have to. She kept her tapered leg jeans and out-of-date sweaters so that I could have the latest. My mom never mentioned if she wanted new things... she showed me what it means to be content with what you have. And now I understand why... I'd gladly wear the same jeans for the rest of my life so that Javik could have whatever he wanted. Recently I had a conversation about this very topic with my girlfriend and she relayed a similar message... for HER recent birthday, she requested clothes for her SON!
The proverbial trench coat lives on.
There are countless more examples of how my mom gave and gave without ever asking for anything in return. Exhibits A through eternity: my laundry was ALWAYS done and I KNOW I didn't do it... Somehow there was always enough money for me to pay class dues, and go to the movies, and buy ANOTHER t-shirt for whatever I was doing that week... When I fell in love with a boy who had stolen my heart, my mom loved him too, she made him part of our family without any reservation...
My mom has given me more than I ever acknowledge... so many things in my lifetime that I'm certain I've forgotten many if not most of them. But the one thing my mom has given me that I'll never forget or take for granted is her unconditional love. I know without a doubt that my mother loves me, for who I am... not ever for what I have done or will do, could give or take, wanted or provided...
she loves me because I am hers.
It was because my mom painted such a beautiful picture of unconditional love and grace that I realized my need for a Savior and ultimately gave my heart to Jesus. And when I made that decision it was my mom who was there to lead me in that sweet, life-changing prayer. I pray that I can lead that same kind of life for Javik. That through my example he will meet Jesus and his life will be changed. And I know that when that day comes, he'll have the greatest grandma on Earth cheering him on!
So this Mother's Day, thank your mom. And on this Mother's Day: thank YOU mom! (assuming she'll ever read this)... And so now, as an adult, a wife, a mother to my own, if ever I grow up: I want to be just like my mom!